Mistakes
by Baby Kitty
Summary: Tommy reflects on the five biggest mistakes he's made in his life. [5 things challenge]
1. If Only I Hadn't

Disclaimer – Yeah yeah.

Author's Notes – I really and truly hope I got this right. I had to check Cmar, Panache, and Dagmar's notes to get a grasp on what this challenge was exactly.

Basically it is a 'five things' challenge. Five short pieces all revolving around a theme, love, death, kisses (which seem to be what Dag and Panache have used), etc. There also seems to be an added rule that these are things that didn't necessary occur on the show.

So that in mind and considering everyone else on the planet seems to be doing one of these bits I have decided to jump on the band wagon and will do mine on 'mistakes'. Specifically mistakes that Tommy has made during his life and regrets. If it sucks…too bad.

Summary – Tommy should have never accepted the Green coin.

-o-

If Only I Hadn't

Tommy

-o-

I knew I shouldn't have taken it, it didn't feel right, I didn't feel right.

Holding the coin tightly in my hand I stare out over the lake. I didn't want this responsibility, this power, this burden. I should have said no. I should have put the coin in Jason's hand when he extended it to me. If only I'd done that instead of saying yes.

-o-

(24 hours ago, Angel Grove Beach)

"_You're one of us now." Hand still on my shoulder griping just tightly enough to let me know he's serious, that he is not about to let me go, Jason looks at me expression tight and tired. "We need you."_

_Feeling a sinking feeling settling over me, I claw for something anything to say in way of protest or excuse. "Even after all I've done to you, to your friends? How can you want me after I nearly killed you?"_

_All eyes downcast and expressions grim I'm given my answer. My real answer anyways. They don't. They don't trust me and clearly don't want me to be a part of this anymore then I do. Maybe if one of them says so, admits what we're all thinking…_

_But no they remain silent, allowing Jason to speak for them._

"_What you did you did under Rita's spell. It's your choice now, the power's in your possession. Will you use it to fight with us?" Free hand coming out, waiting for my acceptance. If I accept everything I am, everything I do, it will change and very likely not for the better. _

-o-

It was on the tip of my tongue wanting to come out, wanting to refuse, but I didn't. I don't know why. Perhaps it was the look in Jason's weary eyes. Perhaps it was the shame of what I'd done under Rita's spell telling me to make it right. Or perhaps it was nothing more then cowardice, too afraid, too shamed, to scared to refuse.

So here I sit staring out over the water, trapped in a war I never wanted to be a part of. Certain I've made a mistake to which there is no fix. I'll one day pay for it with my life I know.

To be continued…..

It was very short I know, next part will be longer….maybe.


	2. If Only I Had Said No

Author's Notes – Like anyone didn't see this piece coming from me.

Anyways so I knew there was gonna be a Kim chapter, I just didn't know what to do with it. Should it be a mistake he even asked her out? Should it be a mistake he urged her to go to the Pan Globals? All interesting, but doubtful he'd consider them mistakes. However, after watching 'Edge of Seventeen' tonight, I came upon something that never was addressed in the show, for obvious reasons.

Summary – Sometimes we forget that girls aren't the only ones uncertain and regretful about their first time.

-o-

If Only I'd Said No

Tommy

-o-

I know I shouldn't have done it, it didn't feel right, she didn't feel right.

"Don't you want to?" Voice whiney and soft rather then the sultry one I'm certain she's going for; her lips extend into a pout, hands still tugging at my white t-shirt.

"Yes, but…" But I'd rather wait? But not in your parents house on a Saturday afternoon? But I just don't feel ready for this?

"But?"

"I just, I don't know if we should be doing this right now. What if your parents come home?" Receiving a look at this logic, I suppose she has every right to be annoyed. She did tell me her parents were going to be out today that's why we came back here after all, so we could have some time to ourselves. Though at the time it was mentioned I wasn't aware that this was what she had in mind.

Sighing, she shakes her head. "They're going to be out for the rest of the day." Lucky me. "I don't see why you don't want to do this."

"I never said I didn't want to." Though it might help matters if I did. But then how would that look? I'm supposed to be her white knight. I'm supposed to be able to give her what she wants. To do what she wants. God I hate relationships.

Perhaps noticing my inner turmoil, she's quick to up the stakes. "Don't you love me?" Bambi eyes pleading with me, hands still refusing to release my shirt she knows how to get what she wants. I think it'd actually surprise our friends a great deal if they ever found out just how manipulative she can be.

"I, of course I do." Feeling bad as the words leave my mouth for I honestly don't know if I do or not, I turn my gaze back to her bed. This really would be so much easier if I was just sure of how I felt. I like her, I know that much. She's sweet and funny, she's definitely attractive, but there's a big difference between liking someone and loving them.

"So why don't you want to?" That's the big question then isn't it.

Looking back at her, slowly taking in her petit form barely concealed by her pink summer dress I struggle for understanding. "I just feel like maybe we're rushing into this. Why do you want to do this all of the sudden?"

"It's not all that sudden. We've been dating for a year, we've done almost everything else." We have? Sitting on the bed and looking somewhere between annoyed and dejected, her next words bring me up short. "You know Trini and Billy have done it."

"What?" Alright now she's making things up. "And who told you that?"

Expression never wavering, she answers calmly. "Trini." Really? Trini and Billy? I mean I know they've been dating, but I don't think I've ever even seen them kiss. Would he have really slept with her so soon in the relationship? That just doesn't sound like either one of them.

"Billy didn't say anything to me about it." But would he? Sharing something personal like that really wouldn't be Billy's style. Girls and their gossip. "Besides that's not really the point, what he and Trini do is their business and I'm not sure I like the idea of you holding it up as a bar for what we should be doing." I also don't think they'd appreciate you telling me what's going on in their personal life.

"I'm not. I just don't see why you're making such a big deal out of this." Because it is a big deal. It's a big deal because I've never done it before. It's a big deal because I'm not even sure if I want to do it now. It's a big deal, because I don't know what I want.

Opening my mouth to tell her all of that and more, I close it just as quickly realizing just how that would sound and how badly she'd most likely take it. "I just want to make sure this is right. I don't want us to do this and then regret it."

Eyes softening as she misunderstands my statement to a degree, she moves fully onto the bed. "Is that all you're worried about? Tommy I promise I won't regret it." Yeah but can I say the same thing? Smiling as I move to her lost for what else to do, she once again takes hold of my shirt. "You're so sweet. You shouldn't worry so much about me though, I'm a big girl, Power Ranger and all that. I know when I want something and right now I want this, okay?"

"Okay."

To be continued…….


	3. If Only I Had Taken Charge

Author's Notes – Die Justin, just die. Come on you all know that little brat blackmailed Rocky. Even on pain killers Rocky has enough brains not to say 'here little whiney twelve year old go take my powers and aid my friends in their life or death mission'. No.

Summary – Mistake number 3. Tommy should have spoken up when the child arrived holding the fifth key, he should have stopped it then and there on the docks, if he had they wouldn't have had a twelve year old harnessing the power.

-o-

If Only I'd Taken Charge

Tommy

-o-

I know I shouldn't have let it happen, he was a child, it wasn't right.

Sitting against my latest Zord in the cargo bay I watch as my new friend continues to eat the piece of bread I'd thrown him. Who would have thought there would actually be living mice on this decrepit old ship, or that I'd be feeding pieces of our rations to them.

About to throw it a chunk of beef jerky next I stop as footsteps sound on the stairs. Watching as the little creature scurries off with what's left of the bread, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised someone finally found me. Not that I was hiding mind you, but with the way the night has been going a little solitude was definitely needed.

"Hey, was wondering where you got off to." Voice soft as if reluctant to break the silence she looks down at me, worry clearly evident on her face. She worries too much, it's not good for her, though neither is nearly getting eaten by an anaconda.

"Needed some time to think." We'll leave out my practice of giving handouts to the stowaway rodents.

"Do you want me to go?"

"No." Taking her hand and pulling her down to sit beside me, I offer up a small smile glad for her company even if it does interfere with my brooding. Who knows, maybe she can help get my mind off this latest mess. Clearly my methods don't work. "I keep messing up. I keep making mistakes."

"Like what?" Would you like the list in alphabetical or chronological order? How about we just go with the latest and quite possibly the biggest one to date.

"I shouldn't have let Justin on the boat."

Snorting softly, she shakes her head. "We didn't have time to deal with him. If you hadn't he would have run off and told everyone who we are and while that may have solved our current problem, it would have made things worse in the long run. You had to make a difficult call. I don't think I'd necessarily call it a mistake. Just…an unfortunate choice you were forced to make."

-oooo-

(2 hours prior, Angel Grove Docks)

"_Who is that?" Squinting against the harsh lights which are suddenly beating down on us I momentarily worry that some of the residents living around the harbor have spotted us and called the police. I wouldn't blame them, four teenagers each carrying large bags and tromping around their boats at eleven o'clock at night, I'd do the same thing. _

_Already pulling up one of my lesser used stories that we have prepared for just such an occasion, I hold back as the lights are suddenly cut and I get a good look at the vehicle. The blue vehicle that is definitely not a police cruiser. _

_Moving to stand beside me, Katherine frowns thoughts clearly running along the same track as mine. "Rocky?" It couldn't be, true he wasn't injured too badly, nothing a few days of rest and muscle relaxants won't cure, but still it's way too soon for him to be up and about. _

"_It can't be." Frowning my mind suddenly clicks on the only other alternative. "Zack?" Zordon said he was going to try and find a fifth key holder before we left, but he hadn't had any luck contacting Zack when it came time for us to go. He must have though, who else is there? Billy is on Aquatar. Jason in mortal danger. Trini perhaps, but not as likely. _

_It has to be Zack than. Good, he's sailed before, he'll be a big help in just getting there. Moving to greet my old friend and chide him for cutting it so close I'm instantly taken back as a much shorter figure emerges from the Zord. Who…no. _

_Obviously not the only one lost by this turn events Adam is the first to voice the boy's name. "Justin?" _

"_Hey guys." Moving forward he waves to us, obviously oblivious to the fact that we are less then pleased with his presence. _

_The next to find her voice, Tanya shakes her head in disbelief. "Justin what are you doing here?" _

"_Guys, I'm the new Blue Ranger!" What is this some kind of joke? _

_Finally shaking myself free of my stupor, I drop my bag giving the child a stern look. "No you're not." And yet despite the words coming straight from my mouth I have the unmistaken feeling of dread settling over me. _

"_Yeah I am." No you're not. Wait I already said that. I need another argument. Before I can find one though, his perky little voice cuts through my thoughts once again. "Good thing you don't need a license to drive a Zord huh." His mood taking a slight dive as this joke is met with a collective groan and looks of disgust from my teammates, he at least stops bouncing in place. _

"_Tommy?" Looking to me Adam's silent question is clear. 'What the hell do we do with this?' If only I knew. _

_Looking between us, the boy shifts impatiently as the silence stretches. "Well are we going?" Okay ignore the child and think Tom. How exactly did this happen? One minute we were on the way to save my oldest and closest friends and the next, the next I'm stuck with an angry team and a twelve year old boy who thinks he's going to play superhero. Right let's just see if this night can possibly get any worse. _

_Shaking my head I move forward ready to handle the misunderstanding and move on with my life. "No. We're going, you, you are going to give me Rocky's key and go home before your father thinks you were kidnapped and calls the police." _

"_It's my key now." Holding said key tightly in his hand, I see this is little problem is quickly growing. And yet I still don't even know how it happened. _

_Deciding that that is indeed the first priority, I scowl to myself, leaving him be for the moment in favor of contacting Zordon. Raising the communicator to my mouth I swear this better be good. "Zordon come in we have a problem." Met by nothing but static I try again. "Zordon this is Tommy please respond." _

_Handling things while I continue to try and get through to our mentor, Katherine holds out her hand in a very clear manner. "Justin give me the key." _

_Pulling back and fixing the blonde with a look that is years beyond him, I do not like how this is progressing. "No it's mine. I'm the new Blue Ranger now." _

_Still unable to reach Zordon and noting the look of fury on my girlfriend's face, I quickly step in to avoid the boy taking an impromptu swim. "You are not a Ranger. You're twelve years old. How did you even get the key?" _

"_I heard you all talking. I was in the hospital room. Rocky couldn't come so he sent me." Rocky sent you? To do what, get him something to drink? This just can't be right. Even on pain medication Rocky would have enough sense not to send a child to receive his power upgrade. No, no this isn't adding up. _

_Arms crossed, Tanya fixes the boy with a look of her own. "He wouldn't do that. You're lying." _

"_I am not. Ask him yourselves." Voice daring us to get in touch with our friend I know that would be a pointless effort as I see the communicator on the boy's wrist. _

"_What did you do?" Pointing to Rocky's communicator, I have definitely reached the end of my patience. _

"_Nothing."_

"_You did something. He wouldn't just give you his communicator, nor would he suggest that you take his power upgrade and join us on a mission as important as this one. So you tell me right now what exactly you said or did to make not only him but Zordon go along with this." _

_Hand coming down to cover his wrist, clearly worried I can and will take back the device hanging off it, he takes a step back finally seeming to realize just how serious this situation is. "I didn't do anything. I just said that it'd be really cool if my friends found out that I knew who the Power Rangers were." You snot nosed, black mailing, little brat. _

_Moving to grab him, Tanya is stopped by the barely restrained Katherine and Adam. This is going to get very bad very fast if I don't make some kind of decision. _

"_I see." Turning to the others I know we're out of time, if we don't leave now Divatox will have too great of a head start which could mean Jason and Kim's lives. This drama will have to wait. "Fine. Everyone get your cars on the boat. We'll deal with this after we stop Divatox." _

_Looking reluctant, but doing as I say they tromp towards their cars each casting one final venomous look back at the child who is now celebrating his victory. Yeah you celebrate now, because by this time tomorrow you are going to be a world of trouble. _

_Grabbing his arm before he can get back to the safety of his own vehicle, I give a strong squeeze, not enough to hurt him, but clearly one of warning. "I will not have a child blackmailing one of my Rangers. Once this is over with I will deal with you. Until then you do exactly as you're told." Releasing him just as abruptly as I'd grabbed him, I watch through narrowed eyes as he hurries towards his Zord look of victory now gone. _

_This is going to end badly I know it. _

-ooooo-

"I seem to be making a lot of those these days." Though I guess that's the price I pay for putting on the red. It was so much easier when I was just the extra, the loner just waiting in the background until I was needed. I don't know how Jason did it. How he was able to make these kinds of choices day after day. I wonder what he would have done with this kid. Probably thrown him overboard as soon as the ship pulled away from the docks.

"No, you just think you do. You're a good leader Tommy, not to mention an amazing boyfriend, and friend. It's just been a really bad couple of days." Try years. Leaning into my side, she offers up a soothing and very welcome kiss. "And this kid…"

"Just the icing on the moldy cake isn't he."

Laughing for the first time since this whole mess with Divatox began, she brings out another smile that I'm surprised I had in me. "Maybe it won't be so bad. It's just for a day or two, then we'll find someone more suitable to hold the powers until Rocky is back on his feet." Maybe. "And until then I don't think you should worry so much. After all how much trouble can one kid get into?"

"Obviously you were never a twelve year old boy."

To be continued…….


End file.
